Three Weeks

This week was tougher.  PMS week, it does not surprise me.  It has been reminiscent of the more gripping kind of anxiety for sure.  There have been some days this week where it has felt as bad.  I did not stick to the no wine rule, which could have contributed.  I had a difficult meeting with an agent, which I know contributed.  And the hormones, ugh.  Definitely contributed.  But, all in all, there was still something different.  I still slept, and something inside of me knows that this week of my cycle is going to be a tougher one, which helps to just accept.  It’s why I let myself enjoy wine and went easy on myself.  No matter what I do, I may just always struggle for that one little stretch each month.  I suspect I’m not alone there.

Today is my day off and already, I can feel the anxiety going down.  I need to clean my house, and it will help if I can start tackling that.  I want to go through each room, cupboard, drawer, etc and just clean.  I did that about a year ago and it felt so great.  I didn’t end up getting through the whole house, but I got through a lot of it.  The areas that get heavy use all need to be done again.  I sort of can’t wait to start.  It’s been hard to start because the last few Thursdays, I spent writing (no regrets), weekends have been the lake or busy with gatherings, etc.  The evenings are not fertile ground for big projects.  Today I will spend my morning here, go for my massage and then get down to business on the house.  It will feel amazing to just start.  This weekend I can try to tackle some more. Eventually, I want to take some time off, and I can finish.  I would love to not devote my whole time off the re-organizing the house so as much as I can get done before, the better.